S@!T Retail Customers Say!!!

S!#T Retail Customers SAY!!! thumbnail

Link to Youtube Video: https://youtu.be/gAs8srOGgBs

To me sometimes retail customers are not always right, and sometimes they are assholes that love to pick on the sales person and make their lives hell. Amazon link you can buy it in paperback, kindle and audiobook!


Black Friday is almost here Retail Workers Prepare!

Happy woman doing online shopping at home
It’s almost that time of year again, and I can say that I can’t wait until it’s done. Black Friday is by far the craziest day in retail history, and it’s a day where people come out to get the best deals they can find just one day. Doorbusters, special sales, and low prices everywhere. A day retail workers would rather drink to forget since it can be the craziest, most demanding day of the year! A day I have worked a lot, since working retail means that day is required. It’s crazy, insane, and the lines are out the door. A day that I have come to dread too since people can be crazy with crowds so thick you can barely walk. There are ways to get through it, and here are some tips.
Wear good shoes.
Have a game plan!
Plan on ringing for hours and clean up after messy people.
Drink after the shift, play video games, and relax.
Make sure to let the customers attitudes roll over you.
Pain medication helps after a shift.
Brace yourselves for craziness too!
Here is an excerpt of my book Tales from Behind the Counter of the craziness of Black Friday!
Day 1 of Kyle’s General Store Black Friday Diaries:
This is the first day out of five that I will be working for Black Friday weekend. I started my shift at 2pm. As soon as I got in the door before clocking in for my shift I saw the black dividers up near the jewelry counter and HBA section for the event lines. Yay! They were already blowing up the balloons in customers service to mark where the Black Friday items are. It was interesting seeing the black and red balloons with the name of the items. Kyle’s tries to make things easy for the customers to find the line they are looking for. They still ask where the item lines are even though they are right in front of it.
After clocking in I make my way to jewelry to find out what is going on, and a customer asks me, “Are you an associate?” Really dumbass? I was wearing the stupid uniform and the fucking name tag and vest proclaiming I was one. Did you eat a bowl of dumbass for breakfast? Like my awesome professor from SouthBend said. Can you read? I was tired thanks to staying up till 1 am finishing a school paper that was due the next day. All I had the energy for was giving him an Are you that stupid? Kind of look. I answered his question directing him to the shirts anyway. Then later a woman asks, “Where is the women’s section?” I tell her right behind her, and she says, “I see the juniors and petite. I meant the one for bigger women.” I point her in the direction of the size she was looking for and all she had to do was keep going down the sections. Lazy bitch! We have signs that tell you where everything is, and that is like the asshole asking where the jewelry and watches are when it is right in the front of the store. 3oclock hit and we had to straighten items in grocery I don’t get why since they are messed up 5 minutes later by asshole customers. In the back when I was putting away the cardboard after the straighten up thing. I see the cherry red While Supplies Last Black Friday items on a pallet wrapped up in tape. Some are filled with clothes, house ware items, and electronics. The aisles are already starting to be cleared to make room for the lines. Stands in the middle are being removed so it wont get in the way of crowds. Another guy asks me if I work at the jewelry counter. I have the case open and the keys are in it….Really? Why the fuck would I be standing there if I didn’t work there? Stupid people shop there I swear. I work thanksgiving so I’ll have more funny stories then since that is when the action starts. It wasn’t too bad customer wise only dumbasses that day.
Kyle’s Diary Stories Day Fucking 2:
Now it is time for the action! The day everyone loses their minds over over-priced items they can get regularly. My shift started at 3pm and lasted till 12am. Already when I first got there 4 cop cars are sitting in the parking lot. People have cleared the way for the lines, and the items for the sales are on the floor wrapped up till 6pm. I was nervous in a way, but more awake then the day before. They are giving out free food for the employees. Yellow tape is blocking various aisles for the line. People are already in line to get their items. The calm before the storm since not many people are shopping. Then the chaos begins, and this is my first Black Friday working since they ignored my availability rules. Dicks. I hate it.
I’m in jewelry safe behind the counter and I’ve already had someone ask me where stuff is and I take a flyer to find out where the jewelry items are some watches in lingerie and some near crafts on pallet displays. Around 5:45 it got crazy and my coworker forgot to give me the keys so I was waiting for the manager to open the safe. Meanwhile, I was cleaning up a display that a customer ran into. I was cleaning it up while people were asking questions I thought it was in the case. It wasn’t but luckily they found out where the sale items are, and they were brought out. Yay! I got the keys and everything was good. It was crazy lines are all the way to apparel. Every register is open, and people are grabbing stuff left and right. I had to answer questions to people, and deal with rude assholes. A lady gave me shit about a necklace asking if it was fake, and I told her it was real since it did not say plated. Later her daughter made her apologize. It was crowded and people were being dicks when the prices came out wrong.
People were trying to cut lines and the employees wouldn’t allow it. The sales in toys was the worst with people pushing and shoving each other out of the way. They were grabbing items like it is out of style. They kept asking where the jewelry was and it was all lined in a row on one side of the counter. A lady was rude in saying, “Is there anyone there to help me?” I told her, “I work here.” Another asshole, “Do you work in jewelry?” Well no shit dipshit I’m wearing a fucking vest, nametag, and outfit… Lady on a mobile cart wanting to try on stuff and saying, “I wont waste your time.” Then she knocked over a display. Then later as I’m picking up a peg that has fallen, “Oh I didn’t do that I swear it wasn’t me.” I ignored it. Taking items to be put back to the displays a guy asks, “What do you have?” I tell him. No, I didn’t have his size. Did I have any more in the back? No’ all the items are already on the floor. What would you do if I cried because you didn’t have my size? I’d laugh. I mean really it’s not my fault we ran out of your size. We put shit out and that’s it we don’t have anymore in the magical back.
It was crazy, busy, and too full of people. Once I got over the craziness I got used to it. The attitudes made me pissed being treated like a dog, but I got all my Black Friday shopping done. I have enough alcohol to be set for months when people piss me off enough to drink. 3 days to go! I think I just might have a drink at home, and at least I met a cute guy that night.

Day 3 of Kyle’s General Store Black Friday Diaries:
My shift did not start until 2pm, and the excitement last night has died down today! There are still items left over from last night in the little boxes they come in. The store is still a mess as people leave shit in all the wrong places. Its not as busy as yesterday which was fucking insane. My first dick of the day. Stands there at the counter: I’m ready. He sees the other watches he missed. Oh, I’m not done looks at more stands. I’m ready. Whatever. I ring his shit up, and he leaves.
Comes back and asks, “Can you put a battery in this?”
“Only if we carry them in the store.” I tell him quoting the policy like a robot.
“Okay, it’s not one.” He leaves.
Another person whose watch I can do. I try my hardest to get the back off but the latch is hammered on too much. Did assholes watch cause it turned out his wife did get it from here. He said it as if I was a dumbass, and he was right. They all do. I straighten up shoes and have to answer more questions for lazy customers. One woman wanted to know where the fitting room was and all she had to do was walk past shoes.
Another lady: Do you work here?
Me: I think I do…
I took over phones for an hour and had to search for a fancy desk that we stopped carrying. Nothing from the AD is left. Same lady calls back twice asking for shit in the ad and we are fucking out. Line 1 for the assistant got too impatient, hung up, and said he got disconnected. Asshole router called again because he was on hold and got disconnected. The next caller goes into a story I don’t care about. I told her I can transfer her to customer service. And she said, “I imagine so.” Fuck you too.
Next Caller:
“Thank you for calling _________ how may I help you?”
“Is this___?” Duh. I just said it asshole.
Lady called the fitting room when she was in the store because she needed help getting items on the top shelf and two employees walked by and said they couldn’t help her. One customer asked a cashier to fold her clothes for her. Last asshole of the day. I transfer him to electronics, and they don’t answer call comes back. Is there anybody working in electronics? I told him I can check. Well, if there isn’t anybody working there then I’m not going to worry about it. He yells, and that was day 3. Dealing with dicks and assholes the entire day is draining. I’m going to a bar after this just to drink away the stupid.

Day 4 of Kyle’s General Store Diaries:
Finally back to my normal shifts for the weekend. The craziness died down today, and it’s a normal crazy Saturday. Nothing but straightening up since its still a mess from the past two days. I’m happy to say Day 5 is a short one. Thank god! I was on the phones for a break, and trying to find an item for a lady. She was rude though saying, “Well, can you look for it again because you don’t seem to know what you are talking about.” Thanks bitch and you’re the one who couldn’t even tell me the proper brand for that item. I really hope you suck a dick, and all I said was, “Thanks I will.” Not even bothering to be mean to her. Another woman complains about waiting for 30 minutes for someone in jewelry it was not that long. She asked about the system, and I told her they would have told me about it. They called and no one came she says. Sure, lying bitch. The customers were mainly nice except for a few people. It wasn’t too crazy either just straightening up. Nothing wild and crazy since the excitement lying down. There was a lady getting mad that I accidently hung up, and did not put her on hold. Oops! There was a lady trying to argue with me about a television in stock. Whatever. I also have super powers because when I touched a few of the watches the customers wanted me to repair they would magicaly start ticking. Interesting day! There are still some boxes left over from Black Friday still. That was my day, and I will be starting my last day of working five in a row tomorrow.

Day 5 of Kyle’s General Store Black Friday Diaries:
I’m happy to say it’s my last day of working five in a row. Thank god I’m looking forward to having the next two days off. Nothing really going on yet since its been slow. My shift started at 5:30 this time I’m only there for 4 ½ hours which is better than 8. I’ve had more good customers than bad ones. The customers today haven’t been bad at all. One lady getting a surprise present for her daughter. A customer was demanding when she said that one right there, and not even bothering to be more specific. Don’t just say that one, give me a description and a price I can’t read your mind bitch. A guy wanted to look at a watch. A customer had to direct another customer to a part of the store then said, “And I don’t even work here.” It was mainly just straightening up jewelry, shoes, and accessories. People are probably getting ready for the work day. At least they are not playing that dreaded Christmas music through the speakers. I’d rather strangle myself with my own lanyard then listen to it. I don’t celebrate Christmas either. A bunch of kids are getting a battery and the girl gives me a dirty look before getting her water. I ignore it. Told a guy that in front of jewelry is the only place we have the sunglasses. Didn’t believe me because his sunglasses were not there. Sunglasses asshole comes back to look again as if they will magically appear out of thin air, and he was at customer service to get a refund or exchange. It was overall a boring last day except for a lady that had to put an item on layaway then cancel since she didn’t have enough money.
If you loved the excerpt here is the link to the book: https://amzn.to/2PSeJyW

And just for fun an excerpt of my novel AngelWitch book 1 in the AngelWitch series which will hopefully be published soon.
Today is one of the busiest days in retail besides the day before Christmas with people itching to get their hands on the latest gadget, television, tablet, and deals they would not normally have every day. I get to the parking lot amidst the crazy drivers, park my Karcano, and turn off the car. I sit there in silence and close my eyes. Shielding the emotions to block it all out.
I imagine my bodies aura around me, and surround my whole body with metal like a tower blocking everything out.I imagine a rock around my body, and it enables me to fully block out everything. Nothing can get through except for my own thoughts in my head. I I don’t want to feel anything for the next few hours from people. I can read minds as well as feel their feelings.
It really sucks when I am folding clothes and a random thought pops up that isn’t mine.
Fully prepared I walk through the door of the crowded store. I see the front end registers already busy with customers shopping with carts full of goods. People checking out, and the beeps of ringing of the items as they are being passed across the register scanner. I take deep breaths as I pass by people, and nearly get hit by an asshole not paying attention to where his cart is going.
Whatever. Fuck you too. I hate this place.
I make my way through the crowd ignoring the customers dumb enough to bug me when I’m not even on the clock. Fuck that since I can get fired for working off it anyway.
“How much is this?” a dumbass asks.
“Does it say a price?” I ask wondering how stupid this customer is.
He looked at the item in question, “Yeah, it says $5.’
“Then that is what the price is.”
I really wanted to say beats the shit out of me, but it is against company policy.
I pass by all the department to get to the fitting room to clock in for work, and I begin the next stages of hell…I mean my shift to work at this lovely establishment.
The first thing I do is find out what is going on since there is usually a supervisor to tell me what to do. Forget about some of the workers they don’t know what is going on anyway. Neither do the supervisors at times they are just as clueless as the workers themselves, and even the managers. The black tape that was keeping the products in its nice safe packaging is removed leaving zombies…I mean customers to get whatever products they want their dirty hands on.
They grab enough to fill their shopping carts not leaving any for other nice shoppers to buy it. $5 for 5 shirts. $1 for 1 item, some grab enough to clothe a family for four years, and then return it the next day just because. Greedy bastards in my opinion buying stuff they don’t need all because of a stupid store sale that comes once a year.I make my way through the flood of people crowding the store like fish in a stream, or more like zombies in a horror movie not after flesh. It’s a nightmare.
The questions I get asked on the way to the tables are laughable. Is this for sale? Is this discounted? Is this really the price? No, it is just a random number we put on there to confuse the shit out of you. If it was on sale there would be a blue sticker if not it’s obviously not on sale.
No, you can’t get a discount since you want to be an asshole about it.
It is the price what else would it be a dildo?
I directed another customer to an item when it was right behind him.
I finally get to my station only to have a huge pile of reject clothes no one wants to buy. Ones they have tried on but it did not fit. Or they just leave clothes in a random spot because they are too lazy to put it back where they found it. Great! I sort through the wonderful piles of shirts, shoes, socks, underwear, and other articles of clothing to make it easier on everyone. Some awesome person took items out of the packages, and left them on pegs. Bastards. 3 carts worth and even more at the day goes by, and even more in the days after it. Days like today I actually wish I didn’t have to hide. Anything but this shit…
A customer comes up to the fitting room desk who is an old lady who looks like she could bake cookies, and then poison you with it all in one shot, “Do you have this item in green?” She asks as she holds up the item in her hand.
I look at the item a plain black shirt, and one of the black friday items. I take the item from her and search for it for her amidst all the grabbing while trying really hard not to hit people with their own stupid full carts. I find the display with it in hand, and search for the item it is not going to be there since it’s sold out. OUT! It has been out for sometime.
I tell her the dreadful news, “Nope, no green all that is left is black, red, and pink.”
Her face falls then she smiles, “Well, can you check in the back because maybe not everything is put out yet?”
I sigh, “The items in the back are all on the sales floor.”
She glares, “Thanks anyway for being a lazy employee.” She walks away.
It makes me tired to hear that people think we have a magical back when we don’t. Our backroom is filled with overstock items which are binned. I continue folding clothes at a table ravaged by customers. I got half a side done. A few minutes later I see a lady come up to the side I just straightened, and she took a shirt unfolded it and left it there she was looking for her size and wrecking everything else in the process. She did it to every single shirt on the straight side, and did not have the decency to put it away.
I grudgingly refolded the side and finished the other side wanting to strangle the lady with the shirts. They were in a messy heap on the floor and I fixed them like a good drone would. Giving a glare her way.
“Hey, Angel you finally made it?”
I smile when I heard that voice since I know who it belongs too all too well.
Kalisa Stryker my light at the end of this shitty retail tunnel. Also my best friend, and one I can vent to at a bar at the end of a long, shitty work day full of assholes.
“Yep, I did though I wish I hadn’t since a nice customer went and messed up my hard work…”
Kalisa has wild auburn curls, yellowish green catlike eyes, and green eyeshadow with a poison Ivy leaf at the end of her corners. She even has cherry plump lips that will make guys fall to their knees. She is pale like the full moon shining brightly in the sky. She does not take shit from anyone and she loves people. She always has a smile for me, and any man dumb enough to fall for it.
I have been friends with her since elementary school, and I really love the fact that she is not a mindless Kyle-kissing drone. I swear some of the employees must have sucked his dick to get the promotions they got. Or, Salem did to get to be promoted to stupidvisor. The dipshit.
“Good. We need to stick together on the battlefield with zombies scrambling for sales.” She said.
Her eyes widen when she sees the mess the customers left, “Fuck me. The piggies are out more today. That is the sixth fucked up pile of items I’ve seen.”
I smile sadly, “It won’t be the last on this hellish day.”
We begin picking up the pile the customers tore through like a lion through a gazelle. I hate it when they do that. It wastes my time when I have to pick up every individual piece, refold it, and put it back neatly then it’s messed up all over again.
Awesome day! I just hope I don’t have to watch the phones they are a pain in the ass more than anything. Apparel people are trained to watch phones since it is apart of the job. As well as putting up stock, putting things back, and watching the fitting rooms and phone. The only reason why phones can be a pain is because sometimes people don’t answer the phones in their department, and the customer gets mad at us. Everything is my fault just because I work there.My fault period.
I get everything done in an hour, and it is still crowded as I fought my way through the horde of people. People are getting mad over not getting a pair of jeans since we ran out the ones mentioned in the ad. Oops.
I really wish I was somewhere else because the energy they give off is hard for me to deal with when it is beating down on me like an echo in the room.
After I was done the supervisor Emma found me amidst all the craziness. The supervisor is a woman with long brown hair to her ass, wide black eyes, and pale skin. She wore the uniform that curved to her body versus fought it like mine always does. She had an earpiece in her ears connected to the walkie to listen in on idiot managers. She is actually one of the good managers who loves her job, unlike some of them who sit there and bitch. Some don’t do jack shit to help their sales associates. She smiles at me, and it was the wicked one that told me that one of my worst nightmare is coming true. “Since you’re done with that task I would like to have you man the jewelry counter with Dreama since she needs help while Jasmine is on her lunch.” She gives me the keys, I take them from her. The little metal keys opened the cases, and it means showing the zombies the merchandise. I mean customers…
I smiled at her even though I wanted to kill her. I hate the counter as much as I hate the register. Kyle always hangs around the front and hollers when there is no one at the counter.
“No problem only an hour right? How bad can it be?” I said using fake enthusiasm. I make my way there only to see it is already busy with non stop humans at least they found all the items since they did not have it earlier. Great! Thanks bitch for making me face the firing squad or stared at like a zoo animal. Dreama spots me her blue eyes sparkling like I saved her from dying. Her long black hair in a pony tail curled to her back, and she is tan from the beach. The uniform is perfectly molded to her body like a second skin making her curves stand out.
I got the extra keys from Emma, and head behind the counter to tag team with Dreama to thin the lines down. I service a few people by showing them pieces, and ringing them up when they are satisfied. It is not too bad things are going well until a guy comes up to the counter and asks, “Can you put a battery in my watch?”
I take the watch and examine it noticing it is not one of the brands we carry inside the store. We don’t take the batteries out unless we carry since a customer can sue us if we break their watch.
I regretfully say, “Sorry, sir due to liability issues I cannot open this watch since we don’t carry it in store.”
He glares, “You have done it before that is why I knew to come here.”
“I can’t open it since it’s not a brand we carry.” I repeat since this asshole is not getting it. And since watches have been broken before I’m not doing it.
He glares, “Then get me Kyle.” As if he can make me work on it when I’m not getting fired over an asshole’s watch.
“I’m here already sir since I saw you yell at one of my associates like a jerk.” He replied appearing out of nowhere like managers do. Of course, there is always the talking of the walkie up close also the jingle of keys can be heard too.
“Now what seems to be the problem?” He asked in a friendly tone even though he is a ruthless douche that fires without warning.
“Well,” he gave a glare my way as if I killed a puppy, “This worker refuses to open my watch since she says and I quote ‘not one we carry’ and due to liability issues. I just want a battery for my watch…” He gives Kyle wide eyes as if he can get his way…
“Unfortunately, it is true due to an associate messing up a watch that we did not carry. We had to pay for it to be repaired.” He replied apologetically.
The customer sighed, “Then how do I get it fixed?”
“Go to the mall I’m sure they have plenty of places there.” Kyle informed him.
“Okay, I guess I will leave.” Then he left the counter. Kyle walked away to bug someone else, and get on their ass about something stupid. And it ends like that sometimes, and sometimes the customer is not an asshole about it.
I service several more customers, and Jasmine comes back. She is a pretty caramel skinned woman with smiling brown eyes. She has long charcoal locks that seem to have a mind of their own. She comes up to me, and I hand her the keys then go back to my section. Thankfully.
But Emma finds me yet again and said, “The lines are too long, and you and Jasmine are needed at the front.”
Noooooooo! Oh the horror! Not the front registers! The first thing I hated about being register trained was being called to the front because people there suck. It is too fast, and there are too many brains for me to handle. Not to mention they are rude to the cashiers, blame everything on them, and treat them like they are stupid.
Chapter 2:
I walked up to the front noticing the ones in line are glaring at me like it’s my fault the lines are long. They always seem to look at the sales associates who are putting up stock when they are waiting in line with such venom just because they are not up there servicing their every whim. The lines are now so long they are past the counter, and some are getting so impatient that they try to check out at another register like the jewelry, electronics, or sporting goods. I go to a customer service manager to get the dreaded register number since they are numbered 1-40 it is a big store, and all lit up thanks to Black Friday. Fuck this day! I’d rather deal with Next Star then deal with this shit..But no I have to anyway.
The customer service manager Melissa who has long, wavy light brown curls, and light brown eyes that can see right into your soul since she is suspicious of everyone. She wore the uniform like it was a second skin. She had the attitude to direct cashiers as if they were soldiers going into the battlefield against an army of mindless shoppers. They are mindless since they have glazed over looks in their eyes shuffling the shopping carts. I make sure she spots me, and resist the urge to hide in a clothes rack so she can’t see me I’ve tried that already and it failed. . I get my register assignment which is 5. The register everyone always goes to because they are too lazy to go to another one. Joy! I take a deep breath, and walk to the registers ignoring the glares the people waiting in line are giving me. In my head the death march is playing in my head because I fucking hate it. It sucks because the people in line usually snap at you over stupid stuff. The shoppers eyes narrowed at me since they have to wait in line with their carts full of crap they don’t need.
I plaster a smile on my face, and imagine them dead. I get up to the dreaded register, punch in my keys and yell, “I’m open.” Even though I know some of them will ask if I’m really open with my light on. They advance like zombies to my register taking merchandise and putting them on the rotating belt.
One bitch says, “Bout damn time I have been waiting forever!”
Aww…you had to wait poor baby!
I grab her items, and pass the barcode over the scanner hearing the beeps as the items scans. Then after it beeps and appears on the screen time to bag!
Fruits and vegetables are together. Dairy is separate as well as meat since meat can leak out everywhere contaminating everything. All the crushed items go in a separate bag like bread and chips. I always put eggs in a separate bag and give it to them. Lastly, no mixing chemicals with food either since you don’t want them to get mixed up and spill on something. I double bag wine and cans. Some people have particular bagging preferences, and I ask it so I won’t get yelled at. This job is easy, but the customers can make it more difficult than it needs to be.
I try to talk to the customer in front of me as I bag her items. But I get done, and then tell her the total. Even though I’d rather be anywhere but here checking out people.
“Ma’am your total is $179.28.”
Her eyes widen, “You can’t be serious I thought it would be less…”
It adds up bitch, especially when you don’t keep track of the money you are spending. Dumb fucks…
“Taxes make it higher to keep the creatures at bay, and we wouldn’t want a werewolf eating the dogs now would we?” I replied cheerfully since we have taxes in the Crystal Crest realm high to help please the supernaturals by paying them to live in the Luxor realm so they can let us be in peace. But I would love to meet one. And this woman makes me wish I had a zombie nearby.
She glares, “Then let me take something off. I can’t believe these freaks make our taxes high it’s bad enough the monsters under our bed are real…”
She looks at the items already in the bag, and gives me enough items to void till the total was to her liking.
“Your new total is $70.00.”
She smiles, “Thanks but you could have been nicer.” Turning me from sweet to bitchy in 2.5 seconds because they treat the people behind the counter like dogs. Or servants. Bitch…This is why I hate the register.
“Yes, maybe but you need to factor in tax before you jump down my throat for something I can’t control.”
She glares again turning to bitchy, “You need to learn manners.”
“Whatever, take your shit, and stop arguing with me over stupid tax dollars.” I fire back.
She takes her bags after I give her the receipt, but not before I erase the memory of me being mean and give her new ones. I do it because people like her complain all the time, and I’ve had this ability since high school when I wanted to erase a moment that has happened like the school bully laughing as I slip on paper. I have powers and I use them for fun. Maybe one day I can find someone from there to see why I have all these powers, and I can’t go there because only a real supernatural creature will be able to feel the entrance to the realm and know its location. Also running so it’s not like I can ask what I am.
After the bitch customer left the people after her are nice, and it almost makes me not hate the register almost. Then I deal with another dick that made me wish I could program them to jump off a cliff.
I scan his items, and tell him the total.
His eyes narrow at me as if I offended him by the total, “Wait, that’s supposed to be 2 for 2 not $4.00.”
One of those guys…Kill me now.
I give him my fakest smile even though I wanted to wring his neck, “No problem, sir I can fix it.”
I meant to hit the void button but I accidentally hit the enter. “You charged it again.” Thanks asshole for pointing out my flaws. Dick.
“I told you I can fix it sir you don’t need to treat me that way.” I tell him since he is being a real dick about it.
I think on how to make it so it shows up that way, and shit head is giving me looks like he doesn’t think I can do the job. And that I’m an idiot who can’t do math.
“Aren’t you supposed to know how to do your job?” he asked me, and I felt like shooting the shit right in the face. I had to add it up and math is not my strong suit. I put it at $1.25 since that’ll work, and tell him. “$2.56.” he gives me change and I put it in the register.
“You’re supposed to give me back $8.00.”
“I know that you rude shit head.”
I give him his change and say, “Thanks for the attitude when its not my fault the register never showed the adjusted price.”
He glared at me, “Watch your mouth or else I will have your job.”
“Take it asshole being fired is better than dealing with idiots like you.” Then I fucked with his mind to make him be nicer to people behind the counter. Dicks like him make this job harder than it should be.
I turn around and there is a cashier to relieve me of this spot in hell. I’m happy not to be permanently there since I hate it. It felt like an eternity dealing with douchebags.
“Good luck.” I told her.

I hope you have enjoyed the post, and good luck! It maybe crazy, but we can all do this together.
Until next time,

How Not To Treat A Fitting Room Person

front final

Don’t do these things at the fitting room…


One of the areas I work in from time to time is the fitting room, and here are some of the thing you should not do at them:

  • Don’t yell at the phone operator if another person in the department we transfer you to doesn’t pick up. We don’t control them not picking up. We don’t have any control over the schedule. They are most likely in another department since managers run then around like crazy.
  • Don’t give me flack over the item limit. I don’t make the rules, and we have to enforce it for security reasons.
  • We don’t have a directory of every item our store carries, and since we are the fitting room we don’t know what every department carries. Let us transfer you.
  • Don’t ask for directions to our store since it’s called google, and the internet is your best friend.
  • Wait patiently for a manager since they are busy running other departments. They will get to you just not right away.
  • If they don’t pick up right away hanging up then calling back isn’t going to help at all. Neither is being rude and accusing us of hanging up on you. We need to put you on hold. Don’t lie and say you got disconnected either since we know the truth. You got impatient and hung up.
  • Don’t leave your clothes crumpled in the dressing room. Place it in the cart instead because it’s nice to do for the person after you, and I hate cleaning up after adults…
  • Clean up after yourself. Never use the fitting room as a bathroom, and please don’t think it’s a good place to have sex in…
  • Don’t leave bras on the floor, and put them on their pegs instead of leaving them for people to step on.
  • Don’t be rude to the operator period since they are humans who need a job. Nothing wrong with that since people need to make money.
  • Don’t ask me what I think of your outfit since I really don’t care.
  • If we are helping you locate an item, be patient, and don’t hang up because when we are shorthanded we have to walk to the area which takes time. Don’t accuse us of hanging up since we aren’t near the phone.
  • Okay, you don’t want an item leave it in the basket or on the place they have for it.
  • Don’t get mad at us because you want to check out at the fitting room when it doesn’t have a register.
  • Don’t get mad at us when the item you are price checking is different then you saw it on the shelf. We don’t control the prices…
  • Never try on undies especially the ones in the plastic packages.
  • Never try on bathing suits without undies.
  • No, I’m not checking your underwear so you can see the size. You put it on this morning you should know…
  • If you leave clothes and plan to buy them tell us, and don’t get mad if we take them and you didn’t tell us you plan on buying them.
  • Please, don’t count out items to me like you think I’m stupid. I’m not a child despite looking like one.
  • Don’t be rude to me like that.
  • Never ball up clothes and leave them on the seat either. Or on one of the pegs inside out. For the love of god clean up after yourself. And if there is no fitting room person no need to tell a retail person just go in your not 12.

These are just some of the things I have issues with while working there, and don’t do them at the fitting room. he fitting room also answers the phone too so just remember everyone is human. Also getting an attitude doesn’t help since people do that daily to people behind the counter. Just be nice and clean up after yourself.

If you loved this post then buy my novel “Tales From Behind the Counter” for more awesome stories and pet peeves! There is more where that came from!

Tales From Behind the Counter!


Why I left Kindle for one book, and AngelWitch is done! Life After College!

Blank notepad over laptop and coffee cup

School is over leaving me to focus on finding a full time job, and it also means I can focus on other projects. AngelWtich rough draft is also done, and since it was by hand I have to put all the changes in the word doc. I also pulled Tales from Behind the Counter from Kindle Unlimited and I left The Killer Contract Agency there since it might do better. I’m at a cross roads in my life since I’m out of school it gives me time to focus on the stuff I want to do. I’m also uploading gameplay videos to a separate Youtube channel then my author one. My plan is to write books full-time and make Youtube videos full-time too, but those take time.


Life after college is way different when you are used to going to school. You now have the option of just working and that is it. It’s also hard to get a job right out of the gate too. In the meantime I’m just applying places and hoping something comes up. The other thing going on is my boyfriend Chris and I are doing gameplay videos together. I play hidden object games, horror, and roleplaying ones. Even a few first-person shooters like Bioshock.

Here is the link: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCI3Ymy1sVC1SYeRYvalbJWQ


Here is the link to my author one: https://www.youtube.com/user/jdsamuels25


I have time to do more Youtube videos thanks to school being done, and time to read and review my favorite books. I also sent A Witchy Beginning to readers to see if it really does need to be new adult instead of young adult, and they said it doesn’t need to be changed. I won’t and when I get the feedback I will go over it again. It may actually be closer to publication then I thought. I’ll update my blog more, and let you know the progress of my books. I’ll also tell you the story behind AngelWitch too.


Until next time,



Things Retail Workers Are Sick Of Hearing From Customers and News!

Pretty office manager isolated on whiteDon’t ever say these things…
I’ve been working retail for way too long to the point where I hate it when a customer says these phrases. They aren’t funny anymore some of them, and I can’t laugh either at it. Don’t ever say these again, and I will tell you why.

Oh, it doesn’t scan so it must be free right? Ha…Ha…Ha…But not funny at all since I’ve heard it way too many times. It’s not funny anymore since it’s a lame joke. It costs something since nothing is free. And it’s even more annoying when they say back in my day they would give it to the person free. I don’t care what they did back in the day since it’s different now.

Oh, I just printed it today…Said when they give me a hundred dollar bill. Not funny when you have heard it so many times. I get it that is the only thing you have, but come on? Do you think you are funny when you say that? You aren’t, in fact, I want to hear something new. I even had a customer joke about printing a penny of all things….Come on…

Do you work here? I wear the vest, name badge, and uniform I do work there, and common sense will tell you I do especially since I’m behind a counter with the keys. I also get annoyed when I’m putting up items, and I’m asked if I work in this department…I do since I have the keys…Come on…Same goes if I’m stocking stuff in the area. 

Do you have this item in the back? No, we don’t especially if the spot is empty and there is no shelf tag. We don’t keep anything in the back except full items…Stop asking that since we don’t keep the good stuff there.

You had this a few years ago at a different store…Then we don’t have it since products change every year. Different stores carry different products. Duh. Not every store is the same. I’ve had a customer think I wasn’t telling the truth because I told her we don’t carry it at this store. We don’t the product was at another store. Then a customer asked if we had a product in stock. We don’t then they ask me when I’ll get it in, and guess what I don’t know since they never tell us when things come in. The lady asked if I worked there long. I do the product she was looking for was at another store in another state. Of course, we don’t have it…

I saw you have it online…And it’s different in store. In store and online are different and carry different products. Shoving your phone in my face won’t make me want to help you find it either. Just because we have it online does not mean we have it in store. Don’t blame me for it either…I don’t have any control of it…

Can I get a discount? No, since you are not entitled to anything. I hate it when customers ask me this. Hell, one guy asked for a discount just for checking out at my register. You are not entitled to a discount just because you ask for it. What makes you so special? I’m sorry to say this but you aren’t better than everyone else. Yes, you spend money, but it doesn’t mean you are entitled to a discount.

You look like you are doing nothing, and need something to do…We are always doing something such as cleaning up after you. One time an employee said it while I was taping up stuff and repeated it twice like I was doing nothing and that I can size her finger. I mean come on no need to be rude about it. 

They did it for me at the other store…then go there especially if you want to be rude about it.

I think you get the point. I can go on and on about this, but retail workers are people too. I get asked the stupidest questions, and I hate it when people act like they can ask something like these questions and think they can get away with it. Just don’t say these ever since retail workers have heard it all, and it gets old…

In other news Tales from Behind the Counter is now an audiobook! Here is the link and especially pick it up if you loved this blog post!  http://amzn.to/2D7XjrC

And The Killer Contract Agency now has a new cover, and I spent 4 hours reformatting it. So when I get the full finished cover I will be republishing it again!

Hey retail workers what are you sick of hearing from customers?

Until next time,


Tales Behind the Counter is out for Kindle!

front final

My book is finally out in Kindle form, but the paperback had issues since I wanted to use colored because I designed a pretty blue chapter heading, but it didn’t show up on the print one. It’s being reviewed and the minimum price was 40.63…nope too much. As soon as it’s done being reviewed I’m changing it to black and white. Then after it’s reviewed I can order my proof in the meantime here is the Kindle version for $0.99 just for 5 days, and then it will be going up to $2.99.



If you think the customer is always right, you’ve never worked at a place like Kyle’s before.

Angeline has seen it all–crazy, stupid, and even mean. For the last five years, customers have tormented her daily in over five departments at her workplace, Kyle’s General Store. In one chapter, she gives advice on surviving retail and shares her biggest pet peeves in the departments she has worked in. Join Angeline down memory lane as she tells her stories about crazy customers and the downright stupid questions they ask.




I’ve also put it in Kindle Select, and it’s free if you have a kindle unlimited version.


I’ll keep you posted on the paper back version!


Until next time,



Tales from Behind the Counter Sneak Peek Chapter 1:

Here is a chapter from my book, and I plan on releasing it mid-june if everything goes well, and I plan on accepting stories up until June 1!
Chapter 1: The Beginning of My Fun Journey!
I never planned on working retail at all. I wanted to continue at the job I was at since I was making 8.75 in the two years I worked there. I was an assistant to a successful company and helped them with research. Then it was bought out by another and I was laid off. I live in the Crystal Crest realm, and after I graduated South Bend high school I went to a community college. The whole time I was working retail on the weekends. I was unemployed for six months and then I got a job at Kyle’s General Store working retail. I’ve graduated community college, and then transferred to South Bend University to major in English and minor in History. I live at my apartment off campus and commute to college.
My name is Angeline and you will see me in my new book AngelWitch where I finally find my escape from retail and move on to bigger and better things.
When I’m not studying for classes I’m at work 4 days out of the week. I have long black hair and smokey grey eyes. I’m pale since I don’t get out in the sun much. I have a slim body, and it fits with the Kyle’s General Store outfit. Black shirts with the words Kyle’s General store, and it has to be collared. Black pants even black jeans are allowed. They have added a black vest to the mix so people can identify who works there, but it doesn’t matter since I still have people ask if I work there. There is a name tag on the left side and it has my nickname Angel for short on it. I love the fact that it’s all black since black is my color. I even wear black eyeshadow and nail polish to match.

I work weekends and working 5 years in retail is slowly killing me. Yes, I make $11.50 an hour since they changed minimum wage in Crystal Crest. The government there decided people need more money, and changed it to make lives better. Retail is not for me though. I can’t stand being around managers that run you to the ground. I can’t stand the customers who want you to break rules just for them, and these are the same people who expect to get a gift card just for them waiting around “wasting their time and expect you to pay them for it.” when you are running other departments as well as yours. Or, they expect to get special service because they spend a ton of money there. None of it matters though.
I work in the jewelry area, and everywhere since I’m expected to be cross trained in different departments when the stupid computers don’t know how to schedule people. My job is mainly the jewelry area, and I show people jewelry. I put batteries in watches only the ones we carry in the store. That policy is not mine it’s the companies, but it doesn’t stop customers from trying to get us to do it. I install watch bands and fulfill personal orders like class rings, name plates and personalized jewelry.
Kyle’s General Store is located off Surrey road, and it offers discount products for a good price. Or so they think. It’s in a really rich neighborhood, and that means the customers have a lot of money to spend at expensive retail stores, but they shop here to save some. Some customers like them expect to be waited on like the store is a high end one when it’s not. Not even close, and some of them even expect you to be their personal shopper. That’s what I hate the most since they act like they can’t read the price, and they want you to even help them pick out their own shoes. They ask questions and don’t even bother looking for themselves.
They also expect you to be able to read their mind when they tell you about an item they found at another store. Or they expect you to walk them to the area if they can’t find an item when it’s right in front of them.
I try to be nice and smile at the customers since there is a ten foot rule only to be ignored or mocked by them. It would be a different story if people were nicer, but some of them are not. They don’t even treat workers like people, and manager Alex called us bodies. Alex Jones the manager below the store manager Kyle has been a pain in my side ever since he started working there. Tall, dark haired, and glacier blue eyes. Always had a scowl on his face, and he was an asshole to people telling them about the ruthless point system when they were genuinely sick. He told me that I should be able to hold it in when I told him I wanted to go home after I caught food poisoning. A ruthless asshole.
“I need a warm body here,” is something Alex said when I was listening in on the fitting room walkie like I usually do. They just need a body at that point even if they don’t work there.
What they don’t tell you once you sign up for said job is they will put you wherever they need you. Hell those idiots move you to where they want you to go, and even if you haven’t been assigned there. Managers will be petty, and assign you to places where they know you don’t like it. Kyle put me on the register so many times that I want to bash his fucking brains in. He is an asshole. He is tan with blonde hair and blue eyes. He looks like he should be out in the sun surfing instead he is making people miserable at Kyle’s. The managers don’t care about you as a person because another manager who is a woman like Alex told me once when I told her I had a Dr’s note, and that it wasn’t planned since the boss at the time never took me off the schedule that, “Their job is not to work around your schedule.” Waahhh. Spoken like a true heartless manager.
Okay, prove my point that half of you are horrible managers.
I hate it here since it’s the same old shit day after day, and over the years every day is an ordeal for Kyle and some of the things he does is fucking ridiculous. Kyle gets on the Co-managers, who get on the assistants, and they take it out on the supervisor and then the associates. It’s a vicious cycle, and everyone is stressed out. When corporate comes I know the day is going to be incredibly long since that is when they are the most stressed and horrible to their employees. They complain about stuff not being done when it should have been done weeks ago, and do shit only when the bigwigs are there. It’s bullshit.
It doesn’t make any sense to put me on the register when I’m in a sale area, and you can thank him and the customer service people for your wait at the counter. It’s their fault anyway. They are the idiots pulling people out of their departments.
The rude and stupid customers make me sick since some of them treat the workers like they are stupid. One bitch even made fun of my math skills when I have a math disability. Customers mess up everything especially after I just cleaned up the area, and I’ve heard a few mothers say, “It’s their job to pick up after us.” When their kid picks up stuff off the floor.
And then after treating me badly you wonder why you get bad service? How about as a customer when you need assistance don’t treat me like I’m stupid I get it I work retail. That doesn’t mean I’m dumb though. Don’t stare at me thinking I am going to automatically know you need help. Speak up and stop treating me like they are incompetent just because you are horrible at communicating what you want.
Some customers can’t describe items worth shit, or they use different terms as if they are more educated then the person working there. It doesn’t make a person smarter it makes them look like a jackass. They also over explain the item to me when they get think I don’t know what they are talking about, and guess what? I don’t one dumbass described it to me silently about undies saying they tuck in like she thought I was a dumbass…Nope. You just suck at explaining. Grunting and showing me what you mean doesn’t help either. And speak clearly and loud enough for me to hear you, and never explain it to me like you think I’m slow.
I’ve written down policy changes in those (which change so fucking often I have to write it down), notes about the job, and some angry customer stories.
Retail is not for everyone, and if you don’t have the ability to let shit roll off you then this is not the job for you…I’ve been a sales associate who works everywhere. I have worked in the fitting room, phones, jewelry, shoes and accessories. I have been working at times throughout all the clothing departments too like: men’s, boys, infants, girls, women’s and lingerie. I’ve helped out in other departments when I’ve needed to such as toys, housewares, lawn and garden even in the meat and frozen food departments. Stupid managers made me since they don’t have enough coverage in other areas, and they are so shorthanded in their areas they can use others too. I hate it since it means I get blamed for not having work done in my department. Yet the dumb managers can’t see how stupid it is to pull from other departments. Not to mention when someone asks me where something is in another department I don’t know where every single item is since I don’t usually work there. Then the customer treats me like I’m the dumb one when they don’t describe the item well and say, “Never mind I’ll find it myself…I thought you would know.”
Then they assume we have all the same things when we don’t and different Kyle’s carry different products. The online website and in store are different and unless online is the salespersons area they aren’t going to know how it works. Don’t ask a sales associate about the website, and stop being lazy and look for yourself. People act like they can’t help themselves…they can.
Part of the reason customers can’t find sales associates in our areas is thanks to the managers. The managers have a stupid habit of pulling people out of their departments and then get mad when their departments are not straightened. It’s their fault since they pulled the associate in the first place. It’s a job that requires talking to people and showing them merchandise. A job that requires answering stupid questions like a customer wanting to know the price when it’s right in front of them, and directing them to the items they are in front of. Times like those I want to slap the person for acting like a dumbass about it.
I have stories for every section I’ve worked in, and I’m going to share it with you. Sit back relax, and enjoy the ride since these are stories that will laugh, entertain you, and make you never want to work retail ever. There is also a special section for sales associates and how to survive retail.
You are going to need it to forget all the stupid people you have dealt with throughout the day. The stories are in their own little sections too, and I’ve even thrown in a pet peeve list at the end of each since it’s what not to do to a sales associate. If you have worked retail you will know my pain, and for those of you that haven’t I hope it will be a real eye opener on how not to treat someone, and you can see the crazy customers we will encounter on a day to day basis…I hope you will learn to be nicer to the person behind the counter too, and don’t say I’m being rude in here and I should get another job since I will have another one. I see day to day how people behind the counter get treated, and I’m sick of it. I should not be coming home crying or ranting because of a rude customer who could not get their way, and I should not have to deal with being run around ragged because the managers expect us to have super powers. I shouldn’t be treated like I’m not a human being because I work retail. I’m human too, and I make mistakes too like everyone else. My head should not be bitten off because another person put the item in the wrong spot, or stole something and it’s my fault the other shoe is missing.
The people who say the customer is always right clearly haven’t worked with the general public before. I’m not saying the job is bad, and without the customer we would not have a job. This is a book that mainly harps on the bad stuff at times. It’s not for everyone. Think of it for people who deal with this shit everyday….These stories can show that.

This is unedited right now, and I’ll definitely use an editor for the grammar it’s different then some of the stories since it’s a series of customer stories. There are a ton of them so I didn’t go into detail with some of them because of that.

I hope you enjoyed it,